Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

I'm not going to go into detail again about my year because I already did that, but I hope anyone reading this had a great Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or (insert whatever holiday you celebrate here)!!! I personally had a wonderful time and I'm looking forward to 2015!! As of now I'm planning to make some big changes to my life!!

Anyway, I recreated a picture I took last year (back when I was only 2 months post op) and put them side by side. I never realized just how swollen I was!!!

Hope everyone has a great (and safe!) New Years Eve, and here's hoping my braces come off soon!!!

xxx

Postponed...again

Not that I was at all surprised, but I had another orthodontist appointment and yet again am without a date. It's kind of funny because the young boy next to me mentioned his two year mark would be in May...his dad says "Yep, it's been a long time!" and I was sitting in my chair wanting to say "If you thought THAT was long, try three years (and three months!!)". And THEN he proceeded to book an appointment in April....to get them off!!! Oh the cruel cruel world.

I have a crossbite now, I guess. I noticed it of course, I think I mentioned it my last post. On the right side either my front teeth moved back or my bottom teeth moved forward I can't tell but it's annoying and now I have "buttons" on the backs of two of my top teeth (I was imagining actual buttons being on my teeth while they glued them on) and now I'm wearing an elastic on the right side, and if this doesn't fix it them I'm tempted to just say screw it!! Rip them off right now I'm sick of this!! (I probably won't do that)

Anyway, that's me and my issue plagued jaw for you. It's never going to come easy for me, is it?? Anyway, here are some pictures I took before my work Christmas party. Hopefully when you next hear from me it will be because I'm really excited about having a date to get this damned metal out of my mouth!!!

 

One Year!!!!!!!!

Oh my GOD!!!! I can NOT believe it's been an entire year since I had my surgery!! On this day last year I made my nervous drive to Kingston and had a nervous wait in the hospital and sat nervously in my nice hospital gown and got wheeled away from my mother and grandpa and underwent a surgery that was going to completely change my life!!!! A year ago at this time I can recall waking up briefly in the recovery room, painfully throwing up blood, and then once again while I was wheeled to my room. Back then, I could barely even see past a few days let alone an entire year! It's just so unreal to me that I spent SO long waiting and fretting about having the surgery, and now it's already a year past. That's not to say my journey is over, though. I still have these damn braces!! But at my last ortho appointment, my doctor said he wanted to have them off ASAP. The only real issue is that the teeth on the bottom right side have shifted forward slightly so that now my eye teeth (I believe that's what they are...I'm not fluent in tooth jargon) are touching and it's not TOO bad, but I notice it obviously and we're trying to get that fixed up so hopefully all goes well! My next appointment is in Decemeber

Anyway, an entire year has obviously brought with it many changes. I look different, for one. Sometimes I'll look at my self and think the change really wasn't that big, but then I look at pictures of me from before and I am still completely blown away!! I'm still on the course of accepting and loving myself, but I am so much further in that journey since I've had my surgery. I am far more confident now, knowing that the people I interact with or even just pass by, aren't just looking at my jaw the whole time (or at least, that's what my constant fear was). I don't need to cover my face with my hands, or hate myself when I smiled or laugh. I can actually eat sandwiches!!!!! And I don't pull all of the filling out!!!

I still have numbness in the same areas I've mentioned below (lower right lip and chin, as well as gums) but it's bearable at this point. I've come to the conclusion that I will more than likely be living like this for the rest of my life, and it's really not that bad. I can still tell, for the most part, if I have anything on my face. My real problem is that the numb side is also a tad bit more swollen, it seems. It's just kind of bigger and...I don't want to say droopy, but it's not quite as tight as the left side (my good side ;D) But no matter.

I've come really far as a person since my confidence has grown, and I am comfortable now with being myself. I no longer care as much for what people think of me. I accept what I like and I don't try to change or hide my interests to fit what other people want or like. I've cut the bad people from my life, for the most part. I'm in my gap year, and next year I hopefully will  be living in Toronto, so I'm not making a huge deal out of making better friends really. I'm meeting some nice people ,and I work with great people, but right now my focus is on furthering my art and getting into OCAD University, as well as working enough to save more for school. I don't need any of the distractions that having many friends brings right now, as I simply do not have the time. I have one great, best friend and it's awesome. I've never been a person who needs more than five friends, anyway, so it's alright.

I'm about to start my second NaNoWriMo novel, another great way to celebrate, as I started my first one last year during my recovery week! I have high hopes for this one!

I'm really beginning to learn about myself and who I am, and what I want to do with my life. I'm looking forward to travelling and meeting new people, and I want to do things that change the world for the better. I don't want to just sit around forever, I want to experience life and I want to make life better for those who don't have the luxuries that I do living in Canada. This year has really brought to light who I am, which is a person I never imagined I would be a few years ago.

I had a rough four years in high school, I'll be honest. I'm still struggling with the insecurities and self doubt that the time there garnered in me and I imagine I have some time left before I can truly keep it at bay. But right now, I am content with life and that's ok with me.

I am beyond happy with my surgery, and I can't wait to share when I finally get my braces removed!!!

Ten months and an ortho appointment!

Today sucked. It was an absolutely awful day.
For some reason my June self decided it was perfectly acceptable to make an appointment for 9:40 in the summer, meaning I had to wake up at 8:45am...........this is a girl who sleeps in until 11-12 every day after going to bed at 2 am. Then I had to go into work for 1 after a glorious 4 days spent down at my cottage, and while backing out of my driveway, trying carefully to maneuver my car between the telephone pole located dangerously close to the driveways edge, and the van belonging to a woman who was meeting my mom (my mom is going to watch her son before and after school, so they were  just meeting) anyway, I turned to sharply and hit the van, putting a pretty sizeable dent in the sliding door, so I'll be paying for that repair out of pocket. If I go through insurance, I'll have to pay an extra $65 a month and that isn't happening so.  She got an estimate today and said it was pretty pricey, but she's shopping around. My mom's guessing anywhere from $500 to $1000 though, so that should be just awesome.
I'm a person who really really hates spending money, I save save save, and I stress over the smallest decrease in my account. I've FINALLY reached a goal of $10,000 saved (mainly for university) and I'm currently looking to buy a new laptop. So now, rather than shelling out about $800, I'll be spending even more. I just can't believe it happened ,and I've been playing it over in my head all day just thinking of what ifs and could haves. Luckily the woman was nice about it, but still. It just really really sucks.
Anyway, then I was ten minutes late to work (partly because of the whole van debacle) but also because I was stuck in construction traffic on the way....so yeah, fun fun day for Ellen (not).

Incidentally, my teeth are KILLING me right now after having my braces tightened, getting c chains on once again, and having a new placement for my elastics. Apparently my bottom jaw has started coming forward again (awesome! ha ha...ha. .....ha) so I guess the elastics are going to push it back, but damn they hurt. I feel like I want to rip all of my teeth right out of my skull.
Anyway, no word on the braces removal, but my next appointment isn't until October (a few weeks after my three years of braces mark, and about 20 days shy of my one year since surgery date)
I'm not sure how the next month and a bit will change things, but you know. I've really given up hope and now I'm just resigning myself to the braces and playing it by year.

So I'm really not sure what the time frame looks like right now, but I'm pretty stressed and emotionally drained right now so I'm trying not to think about it right now honestly.

Well, that's really all I've got to say for now. Have a gander at some post surgery pictures of my face.

Thanks for reading (:

xx

Prom and Graduation!

Unfortunately I didn't get to have my braces off for prom or graduation, but my smile is still so much better and for that I am very thankful!! I thought I would post some pictures of the two events for fun, and I even have a picture of me from my grade eight graduation to put up next to grade 12...absolutely AMAZING.

I've said it a hundred times before, and I won't stop saying it, but WOW this surgery is incredible.

Prom: (my hair definitely did not turn out well, but whatever I had fun)

 




Grad:

 

Seven and a half months!!!?!¿¿!

Time is flyyyyyyyying!!! Its been over seven months already! I know I'm surprised whenever I make such a statement but I can't help it!! Its been a BIG ((school)) year! Jaw surgery, turning 18, 5 concerts, and prom is coming up! Plus, I'm graduating this year!!!!!? 

Anyway, I went to my orthodontist a few days ago and it sounds like there's still quite a bit of work to do.....:( 

I overheard him mention something about a crossbite?? Ugh 

They put a tie on to fix the gap between two teeth on the right upper side of my mouth, and they have to adjust my midline a bit more ((I did notice that my bottom teeth are a little off and a little..slanted? I guess)) I have to wear elastics now too, which suckkkssssas so muchhhhhhh. It's only been a fewdays but my teeth STILL hurt after the tightening and the elastics make the pain even worse...so hopefully it ether goes away or I get really used to it.

I'm still taking that Gabepentin stuff for my numbness. I don't think there's been much of a change yet,  because I feel like any slight changes I do notice might be psychological rather than actual changes..he did say it would be a slow process, though, so hope is not lost!!

It's amazing how much work there still is to do after surgery.... I feel like a lot of people ((or maybe it's just me idk)) just think oh surgery and then perfect teeth yay ! NOT THE CASE APPARENTLY. 

I can't wait for the year mark and beyond. Dr Barr says the swelling is all down by now, but my face would still change and the bones and facial structure start to smooth out so I'm anxious to see the true 'finished product'!!! 

Anyway, I guess I'll just leave y'all with some pictures of my glorious, issue plagued face!! 

Have a happy Friday the 13th!! 

xxx

 

Week Twenty Seven! ((Over five months!!))

As noted before, I am a horrrrrrrrible blogger! But I mean I don't really have many readers at this point anyway...still, I feel bad ok.
Anyway, we're already past the five month mark and I can hardly believe it!! I never even thought I would get past that first week. I remember completely regretting it the very first day I was back home, and several times throughout the week. Now I can barely remember that time even happening ((besides the fact that it was absolutely horrific)). And ever since I've been able to eat solid food again, I hardly even think about it!

Of course, I'm almost always thinking about my jaw these days. It looks SO good ((the jaw, not my face lol)). Like I've said before, I've never been happy about my looks so it's hard for me to like what I see, but I definitely like this much better. I'm slowly learning to like me for me and love myself, but it is very hard to do living in such a materialistic world...

Anyway, unfortunately I will be having my braces on for several more months. By the time I get them off it will be closer to , if not more than, three years with them on. They told me it would only be two - two and a half years....and I really wanted them to be off for graduation and prom. It was sucky enough having them for my grad photos, it would have been nice to have them off and be able to flash my nice, straight, not metal teeth! But oh well, what can you do..

The lower right area of my lip/chin is STILL numb! My oral surgeon put me on medication called Gabapentin, which was actually created to help people with epilepsy but now it's also used in a case like mine in order to assist the nerves in repairing themselves. Think of it like it's sort of like a puzzle, and the nerve is having trouble figuring out where to put the pieces so the medicine goes in with all of it's knowledge and science power and helps it out. I've only been taking it once a day for three days so far, and then next week I start taking two and day, and then three a day the next week. And then I go in to see him and we'll see how it's going. There hasn't been much change thus far.

Swelling is basically all down now, at least if you don't know me well. I still see some swelling around my cheeks and chin area ((mostly cheeks)) and the people who really know me can still sort of tell, but if you just met me or if you didn't see me often then you would probably just think I have a puffy face. It hasn't even been six months yet though, and lot's of people have said that it can take up to a year ((or even more)) for it all to go down so I'm still dreaming of a nice, chiseled jaw line Angelina Jolie style ;)

Anywhooo, that's all there is to say for now. I'll leave some pictures down here, but there hasn't been much change.

Hope everyone is having wonderful lives!!

Week 20

Wow I last poste in February.... so bad at blogging  Of course there really isn't muh to say at this point, the recovery is over more or less. I still feel like theres a little swelling left but maybe it's just because my dace has changed and I'm not used to it. Still waiting for the numbing to go down but it can take up to even a year so that's still a work in progress. 

I slacked a little in my jaw exercising so I'm still sort of stiff, and I can still only open about three fingers wide. 

BUT I can eat sandwiches perfectly and that it SO nice oh my god. 

Anyway, I don't know when braces will be off but it probably won't be for another several months still. Sigh. 

I just can't believe that this time last year I was anxiously waiting to hear I was ready and get a date.  I was so excited that I only had 'four or five months to go' and now look at me. I can honestly say I am so happy with my face (: 

Well, until next time ((whenever that may be!))   

Youtube video!

Hey, y'all! (I'm not sure why I just said y'all..)

Anyway, I have ventured into the realm of YouTube and have concocted an extremely long video about my experience with jaw surgery. Obviously I am incapable of capturing the realities of surviving day to day throughout jaw surgery recovery, but I think it's a pretty decent first look for anyone thinking about going through with it. Excuse my slight lisp...braces and stiff jaw combined is not pretty. Anyway, if you want to check it out that would be great. If you want to continue to check out new videos that I post, even greater! ;D

Anyway, I thought I would let any readers know about it if you have about 20 minutes to spare hahaha.

Hope you're all having a fantastic day, week and year, we'll potentially see you next week!!

xxhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gt2Key6_kTY

Back again really quick! I just made a little collage of before and after pictures! The before pictures were taken actually back when I was just sixteen and a bit, so that would have been August of 2012. I have a post about it here: http://adventureoftheunderbite.blogspot.ca/2012/08/blog-post.html#comment-form 

Anyway, I used those and then pictures of me right now (the ones I used in my week fourteen post/three months) at the ripe old age of eighteen. There is SUCH a difference that I didn't completely realize the severity of, it's absolutely incredible and I am SO thankful to be living in a world where this is possible. I am SO happy with my new bite. Even though I have those "oh wait, that's a bit off" moments, I just look back at stuff like this and think 'hey, at least I don't have THAT anymore'. 

I'm learning to love it completely more and more with each day (plus I can bite into things now!!)

Anyway, that's it for today! Thanks for reading!!

xxx

 

Week Fourteen!! ((January 30 marked month 3!))

Wow I've missed a couple weeks now! It 's so weirdbecause before surgery I would literally spend hours looking at blgs and looking forward to making one of my own, it occupied my mind almost all the time, but now that three months have passe it's just sort of normal life I guess. 

I saw my surgeon on January 27 and he told me that everything was looking great. He sai something had shifted which was too bad but not a bad thing per se so I'm not too worried.  I don't see my orthodontist until February 19th thoigh so still bo word on when I get my braces off. I had to have my grad photos done with them on whoch kind of sucks but oh well. 

My chin is still a bit stiff but I can eat pretty much anything now, I just have to be a lot more careful with hard things like certain chocolates or almonds etc. I still think there is a TINY amount of swelling left but for the most part I think that it's pretty much gone. 

I know people have said that some numbness can take up to a year even to go away but the right half of my bottom lip is still, I would say, about 80-90% numb. It just doesn't feel normal, but there is pain when pressure is put on it so there is SOME feeling in there. The same goes for my chin. I guess all I can do now is be patient about it. 

I don't have much to say anymore, but I might make a YouTube video about my journey in the future, we'll see how my schedule pans out hahaha. 

Anyway, that's all for week fourteen (on wednesday at least) , You'll see me again eventually!!! (: 

xxx