so this doesn't have much to do with orthodontics, but it does concerns under bites as well as my life dealing with it. like many people probably do (if not, then I advise that you do! although if you're reading this then...obviously you have) people with under bites tend to google about them, whether it's photos of other people, or before and after photos, or peoples YouTube videos, or other blogs blah blah you know what I mean, tonight I was googling out of boredom, trying to find before and afters because I'm always nervous and wondering how much a difference this really will make to my face, and I cam across a few photos of girls on some chat site, posted by random guys who had found them saying all sorts of rude things like how ugly they thought she was and all of the things I just don't want to repeat, especially since there were so many! a few people wrote about how shallow they were being but, of course, that won't do anything. I had an angry reply all set but I thought better than to become involved and deleted it. I also found the picture below(my regards to whomever the girl in t is) you know, honestly this society makes me sick. I know it isn't everyone, but it sure is a lot of them. everywhere i go, I know that people - especially guys - notice and judge my bite. when a pretty girl walks by, she'll catch the attention of a guy and maybe they'll have a happy ever after, maybe they'll just hookup, whatever. me? I walk down the streets, and of a guy does give me a second look it's gonna be a "omg" kind of thing. and you know, even if the guy is really nice, you know that he'll still probably go for the pretty one unless she's obviously stupid and lacking common sense. anyways, I just wanted to get this off of my chest and share it with you. I mean really, how completely ignorant can the people in this society be? do people honestly think that the fact that I, or anyone, has an underbite is a mirror of our personality? or are they just so shallow that they couldn't stand looking at it until it gets fixed. well, when I have my surgery I hope (though I also doubt) that I will be pretty enough to grab some guys attention that I wasn't able to before, and I will laugh in their face as I reject them.
I mean, of course this is just a sadistic dream of mine, I doubt I'm going to end up that much better!
anywho, good night to you all, Beven though I don't really think there are many at all, and especially none who are coming back. but whatever, like I said, having this out here makes me feel good, whether it will help someone now, or a year or more from now!
ellen
I'll be following. Keep it up :) as someone who was mercilessly bullied at school for my underbite I can wholly sympathise with your point about those narrow-minded people on the chat site.
ReplyDeleteI am 28 now (due to have surgery in April/may 2013. Due to my lack of self-confidence I had my first boyfriend at 21! Pretty embarrassing. But looking back it wasn't my appearance that prevented me from getting a boyfriend but simply my own opinion of myself. As soon as I accepted who I was I started being asked out by some lovely men - the good ones are kind and my current partner says that I am gorgeous and doesn't want me to have the surgery. What I'm trying to say is, do this surgery for yourself and no-one else. When you are happy with that the nice guys will start looking your way. Good luck xxx
Hi! Thanks for reading! I'm sorry about the bullying, honestly I hate how many people are so ignorantly cruel (although some are not always so ignorant, just simply cruel). I've never been bullied straight to my face but I've heard of people talking about it behind my back. I'm not sure if I mentioned the guy who mocked me around his friends once when he didn't seem to realize that my best friend was at her locker right near his. Apparantly he stuck his jaw out and went "hey guys, I'm Ellen!" That really hurt, as it was grade nine which, as many people know, as your first year of high school is scary, and important, and intimidating. All you want is to fit in, or to slide by unnoticed at least. Of course, I hated hearing about it as it only made me feel worse so I told my friends that I never wanted to hear about anything like that again if they wanted to be good friends (incidentally, that particular friend ended up being someone who enjoyed bringing other people down so we quit talking)
DeleteAnyways, wow! That's great news! How far in advance did your orthodontist have the surgery set (or atleast the general idea). I'm going in on the fourteenth and I'm desperately hoping for an idea for mine, which I hope will be the beginning of this summer. I'd much rather be in recovery while I don't have school, because I'm not going in looking like I've been hit by a truck! :P
You're 28, you said, which is still young but in regards to the surgery I was under the impression that the work usually began for everyone the same time mine did. Is there any reason you waited, or had to wait? Just out of curiosity, of course.
I'm starting to accept the fact that not having a boyfriend this late (I say late, while I'm only 17 lol), knowing that boys at this age are generally immature and it really won't be such a big deal in the long run. Of course, it's hard with the happy couples all around you enjoying all of their teenage bliss. Hahaha, well, teenage boys are what they are I suppose.
I see what you're saying about it not being about your appearance, and I guess I'll probably realize that as I get older but I mean right now all I see are the beautiful girls with their boyfriends and me hating myself so that's what my brain automatically deducts I suppose. Of course, there is that whole "if you can't love yourself, how can you expect anyone to" saying, however it goes, right? So it really does all come down to that in the end.
I'm really happy that you seem to have found such a great guy! OF course, most guys will never understand girls and their looks haha. They think you're beautiful, so you're beautiful. Doesn't matter what you're mind says (which is usually wrong, or just very harsh) I feel like such a hypocrite saying this, as I understand how stupid it is while I do the stupid thing I'm talking about, picking myself apart.
In the end, yes, the surgery is definitely something you do for yourself. It may be influenced by society and it's people, but it really is up to what makes you happy.
Sorry this reply is so long! I've been told I talk too much, so I suppose I type too much as well.
Thanks again for reading! Good luck with your surgery, let me know how it goes!! And good luck in your relationship as well, you seem to have a good guy in your hands! :D
Sorry for the late reply, I didn't receive an email that you had responded, it was only by chance I noticed up reply. The reason I am having the surgery at 28 is because when I was first offered the surgery at 14 it was considered a very dangerous surgery and my parents didn't want to put me through it. A few years ago I started suffering excruciating jaw pain and my dentist encouraged me to have it done. I haven't looked back. I'm looking forward to it.
ReplyDeleteMy ortho hasn't booked it yet, she simply said she expected it would be April or may.
If you want you can follow my blog - I think you should find it on my blogger profile.
You are very wise to know that your views on life and people will change as you get older. Its a healthy attitude. And to be honest, although I'm doing my surgery for me; not being pitied on my appearance will be an added benefit!
Take care x